How do our kids ever grow up even halfway normal when parents do our best to throw them a curveball rule-reversal every time a holiday rolls around?

For example:
Don't talk to strangers - except at Christmas when I tell you to go talk to that fat guy in a red suit.  Wait, don't just talk to him, sit on his lap!  And be happy about it.
It's not polite to ask people to give you things - except at Christmas when you can tell a complete stranger to bring you a whole list of stuff, and at Halloween, when you walk around demanding that people give you candy.
Never eat anything you find on the ground - unless it is Easter - then the more you pick up off the ground, the better egg-hunter you are.  Eat up!
It's mean to pinch - unless it's St. Patrick's Day.  (eurgh - that one causes trouble!) 
It's rude to ring the doorbell and run - unless it's Valentine's.

And I'm sure there are more that elude me right now.  See what I mean though?  Warped!
 
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